This next blog is about the importance of saying two words, ‘thank you’. 

We’ve all done it… but it’s often too easy to overlook the small gestures in our lives. But showing appreciation by thanking someone can have a profound impact on both our relationship with that person but also each other’s well-being. That simple act of gratitude is not just about good manners; it’s about acknowledging and appreciating the efforts of those around us.

Whether it’s someone giving up their seat, a colleague who helped you with a project, or someone who held a door open when you had your hands full. A genuine ‘Thank You’ can make them feel valued. 

Saying thank you, to me, is really vital, and can lead to a happier, more fulfilling life. For the person you say thank you to, they feel seen and acknowledged, and even though doing the right thing, the polite thing, well it should be second nature to all of us, and often that person steps past that point, and does something far greater. 

But regardless of the perceived size of that act of kindness, it costs nothing to say ‘thank you’, yet it can mean everything to that someone.

So come on, own up, when was the last time you said thank you? Not just for someone holding that door open; when did you last thank someone for being in your life, for helping and encouraging you? It’s strange, isn’t it, that we’re so careful about remembering to thank people for our small change in the supermarket or for complementing our work – but when it comes to the bigger stuff, like supporting us through a hard time, how often do we really thank those around us? 

I have in particular two thank you’s I would like to share. The first one is a friend of mine who after reading my Niceknockers blog which I usead to write during my cancer treatment, said I should keep writing, as they thought I was that good. They literally kept on nagging me until I started this one. You have them to blame (ha ha).

The second person was well over a year ago, I had reached out to my GP for some counselling support as I was really so sad and struggling with a lot of the utter crap,  I’d been through in the preceding years. When I told him the whole story, even my GP said it would have broken the strongest person, and he signed me off from work as well as my referral. But, when I eventually started counselling, I was assigned a lady, we’ll call her ‘A’, whose words of advice I still lean on today. She took the time over our many sessions to completely listen to and push me to explore why I was feeling like I did, and to not always try and bury the pain. Rather to find ways to help myself with CBT and to know that there were already things in my life that would give me some self-appreciation, joy, and love – I just had to look for them. It was an immensely hard process for me at the time, as I had many years of bad habits of hiding away from the pain and trauma, but she stuck with me on the days I just sat and cried, and helped me find my own way out of all the darkness. During this process, and while we talked about things that I enjoyed and had helped, she found out about my writing, and so with my friend’s previous encouragement to start the year before, this wise and amazing lady got me sitting back in front of my keyboard.

As my trust in her and my self-belief grew, she was the first, and at the time, the only person who knew about my correspondence friendship with a lifer in America (which you now all know about from Rigoletto Redemption). And over this last year I’ve kept writing and it continues to help me share my thoughts, my new life, and feelings, but also on the days when I am feeling rubbish or even just a bit sad, it has been an incredible way for me to sit with those days and not bury them. I may not always talk about MH but for me the writing itself is the catharsis. 

When the days they seem to fall through you 
Well just let them go!

Lyrics by: Damon Albarn, Graham Coxon, Alexander David & Alexander Steven

She also helped me find the things in my life that bring me happiness, like music and the Barry white mirror ball moment amongst many others. She was one of the first people I told when I crossed the border into Italy last year. Her support was very much with me that day and I let her know how in that moment, how she’d helped me. I guess the best why I can describe this to you, is that while it is one thing to sit down and write, however well that may or may not be, you also need to stand up and live.

Now, the other day I was driving through the Umbrian countryside, and the view was so beautiful and Barry White’s ‘Let the music play’ came on the radio and set me off  again, but this time they were good emotions … some reflection and thanks for that lady who by her wisdom all those months ago, continues to do so much for me. She knew that music is a huge part of my life, and she had dug away, and wouldn’t let me hide, until I revealed my go to track. 

Let the music play 
I just want to dance the night away 
Ah, here, right here, right here is where I’m gonna stay

Lyrics by: Burt F. Bacharach, Hal David, Sung by: The late great Barry White. 

And also, to that other friend who I bloody know is reading this, I may call you a knobhead in our late night WhatsApp chats, but I owe you too, thank you. 

So if someone has given you their seat, let you in at the traffic lights or if they’ve gone out of their way for you, or told you that you have a talent when you don’t see it yourself, however small or large, say thank you – let them know how you feel because they’ve taken the time to hold you up when you needed it. 

I hope you don’t mind

I hope you don’t mind

That I put down in words

Lyrics by: Bernie Taupin and Elton John

They have done things for you without expecting anything in return. 

However you go through life, don’t forget to acknowledge your own self-worth, and thank those who see yours. 

This one is for knobhead and for ‘A’, one amazing lady, with my gratitude.

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P.S. And lastly to the person who messaged and asked that I put the songs I quote extracts from into a Spotify list; what a brilliant idea, thank you. I’ll link it to the blog from now on and each will contain the successive titles used. You can then experience my weird taste in music in all its glory.

Give this a listen:

Follow me at: @write.upmystreet